Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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