I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
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