you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
