I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
