I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
