We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
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