margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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