so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
