never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize