Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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