My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
She bit a glass in half.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
