so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I touched a dick in church today
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
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