Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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