I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
