I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
