I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize