Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize