Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Randomize
