u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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