Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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