Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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