I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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