South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
