Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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