So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
