New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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