I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
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