i may or may not be watching the land before time
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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