no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize