you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
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