ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Randomize
