M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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