he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
