no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
