So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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