thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
