I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Randomize
