he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
