This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize