please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
