You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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