OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
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