They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize