Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
