making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Randomize
