New low: just hacked my moms facebook
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
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