shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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