As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
