I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
