Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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