this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize